I was in Chicago with my husband, his mother and his younger sister. It was an incredible experience to watch my in-laws in the United States for the first time and to have the opportunity to spend quality time with the family. With that said, the trip didn’t come without a little stress from the responsibility my husband and I had, to orchestrate the logistics on behalf of everyone.
There were moments when each of the four parties had a different opinion, or varying preferences about where we should go, when we should go there, and how we should get there. With no real scheduled agenda, it was a free-for-all, that we figured out as we went.
It was during the moments when we were collectively figuring it out, that I realized the true value in the phrase, “go with the flow.” I recognized, our vacation (and each little moment/decision) could go a thousand different ways, and any of them would be just fine.
We were heading towards Millennium Park when we got off the L-line and something subtilty awesome happened to me…
As if I received a universal truth, in one instance, it was so clear to me that whenever we experience a negative emotion, it’s because we are in resistance to what-is.
If we set our personal preferences aside, and don’t resist what is, we can be in-the-flow and experience situations with ease.
Think about it. The reason you experience a negative emotion, is because you believe that if things were going differently, specifically if they were going the way you prefer they go, then the situation would be better. But, “Who Knows What is Bad and What is Good” anyway.
What if instead of trying to change and control the situation (which is often not realistic anyway), you focus on changing your resistance to it?
You’ll recognize resistance when you find yourself experiencing, for example: irritated, annoyed, angry, frustrated, or basically any negative emotion that makes you feel “sour”, as my mother in law puts it. When you recognize resistance happening, ask yourself if the situation is worth fighting for, or would it be okay to let it play out on its own.
“In matters of principle, stand like a rock; In matters of taste, swim with the current.” – Thomas Jefferson
And remember, “It’s Only Yourself You’re Ever Really Dealing With.”